Showing posts with label #parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #parenting. Show all posts

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Calming the Kids with Mom2MemphisAndRuby + GIVEAWAY!

Hey there!
I'm so happy Laura invited me to hang out on Our Reflection while she's on holidays!
My name is Lena and I blog over at Mom2MemphisAndRuby and Lena B Photography!  I'm a mom of 2 wild and wacky kids and they certainly keep me on my toes!!  They're at that age now {4 & 6} where they either get along fabulously... or not at all.

Case in point.  I used to LOVE bath time.  It was a nice "wind down" from our day... there was nothing better than hanging out in a warm room listening to their giggles & splashes, am I right?  Not to mention the smell!  Oh, babies smelll sooooo good after a bath!

Well, that has changed a lot in the past year or two.

When they do take a bath together, there's splashing alight... AND lots of whining and screaming too.  Nobody thinks they're dirty and nobody thinks they need their hair washed.  The whole thing has been quite unpleasant.  

Until I remember something I saw on Pinterest a while back.


Glow sticks!!
Can I get an "Amen!?"

I'm totally serious!  Grab a few of these, turn off the lights and it's a whole new experience!  They LOVE it!  And it's such an inexpensive "treat" at the end of the day!  They're having fun, and I get to make sure they're clean... without any screaming or arguing.  It's a win-win!



So, that's just a tip from one mother to another!
I'd love to hear your tips for keeping bath time under control!

You can visit me on Facebook & Twitter too!


And since I'm here... I'd love to offer you the chance to win 2 months medium ad space on my blog!
It'll be a great way to get to know each other better!




a Rafflecopter giveaway

Saturday, June 2, 2012

I almost didn't live to tell this...


Almost 7 years ago to the day, my life changed in an instant. Childbirth. Our second none the less. It was suppose to easier the second time around. I almost didn't live though it.

It was 7 week before our second child was about to be born. Everything seemed to be perfect. I was at work one afternoon and noticed I felt a little different. I had started spotting. Panicked? Just a tad. Luckily I work with my husband so we left early and headed to the doctor. That moment your doctor gets that look in his eye, that you get goose bumps, I was there. It seemed like the exam was taking forever. He turned to my husband and I and said, you're in labor. Dilated to 2 and 100% effaced. Excuse me. Come again. I still had 7 weeks left. How could I be in labor? Immediately he told us these were the key weeks in fetal lung development and he wasn't sure if the baby's lungs were ready. I was on immediate bed rest.

We went to pick up our daughter from my mother-in-laws and headed home where the bed was going to be my best friend for the next 7 weeks, or so we hoped. In the car I was making all the family phone calls letting them know what was going on. Talking to them, calming their nerves was helping convince me everything was going to be fine.

Then it happened. I walked in the front door and felt this huge warming sensation. I was for-sure my water had broke. What felt like slow motion, I looked down to be horrified I was covered in blood. Panic hit. Something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong. We turned right back around and headed to the hospital while the whole time I'm on the phone with the doctor who was meeting us there. All I knew I was to skip the ER and head right into labor and delivery. My head was spinning. All my focus was on if the baby was ok. For the longest time, no one could tell us for sure.

Finally we heard that wonderful sound. The sound of our babies heartbeat. All the tests came back that baby was fine. The bleeding had all been for an internal tare from me, nothing to do with the baby. A sigh of relief. I thought the worst was over. Boy was I wrong.

 They told us for the next 6 weeks, I was staying in the hospital. They needed to monitor the baby and I at all times. They were trying to keep me pregnant even though it seemed as though the baby wanted out. Slowly over the next two days I dilated to 4. I knew I wasn't going to making it 6 more weeks. The baby was coming. The night of April 24, 2005 was one I'll never forget.

I had been in labor before. Even though it had been 7 years earlier, I knew when my body told me the baby was coming. And the baby was coming! I called the nurse and told her my body was ready and she assured me that I was no near ready. Really? So this sudden urge to push I wanted to tell her was a figment of my imagination. I demanded the doctor. My doctor wasn't on call that night so I had this lady walk in that we'd never met before but immediately felt at ease. She gave me the speech "So you think you're ready hua?" I told her I wasn't sure if I was, but the baby wasn't holding back. It took her less than a 5 seconds into the exam, her eyes grew wide as golf balls and I remember those words "It's time!". I was 10 centimeters dilated and the baby was coming. Since the baby was still considered a primi, we had what seemed like the entire hospital staff in this room. All my doctors and nurses, plus an entire staff of doctors and nurses from the NICU ready to whisk this baby away the second it was born.

The lights went dim except this huge spotlight on me, my husband took my side, and I remember hearing the doctor say "It's game time." That's when it all hit me. This wave of emotion {and fear} from remembering  some complications I had right after the birth of our first daughter came to mind. I had switched doctors and told her of my history and was assured that was something that would most likely not happen again. Less than 15 minutes and 3 pushes later, our beautiful daughter Charlie was born. Everything seems to be normal. Daddy cut the cord, they wrapped her up and I held her which felt like a split second when all the NICU nurses wanted her for examination. They were doing most of the exam in the room and quickly let us know she was perfectly healthy, breathing fully on her own with no help of a respirator. Besides being only 5lbs 4oz, she was as healthy as a full term baby. The sigh of relief from my husband and I was instant. I insisted he go with the baby as they took her to the NICU that I would be fine.

My husband wasn't out of the room a few minutes when the doctor had this uneasy look about her. Without going into too much "after birth" description, things weren't happening the way the normally do. I had been anti-drug my entire labor and the doctor was well aware but told me the baby was born and they needed to do a procedure that would be painful without a drug. I agreed. From that moment I remember myself slipping into a fog. Then everything went dark.

What I thought had been the medication putting me to sleep, was actually my body slowing giving up. The doctor hadn't realized how much blood I had just lost. Almost 3 liters. What I'm about to share when you comes form the stories heard from my husband. He was in the NICU with Charlie when lights starting flashing all around and the words "Code Blue" streaming from the speakers. All the doctors and nurses started rushing towards the room that needed help. At this point he had no idea the person needing the help was me. A nurse ran up to him and said, "Mr. Hernandez, it's your wife. Please come with me." She rushed him towards my room but would let him inside. The room was filled with so many people he wouldn't have fit anyway and he still hadn't yet been told what was going on. At that moment they wheeled me out of the room towards the elevator, and that's when he first saw me. Fully-ventilated with tubes going down my throat, wires everywhere and a machine breathing for me. Right then the doctor let him know I had lost so much blood they could no longer register a pulse and I had stopped breathing on my own.

My poor husband. I can't even begin to image what he was going through. He'd just gone though having a premature baby born and now that he almost lost his wife. First thing he did was start praying. He knew everything was out of his control so he put it all in the hands of God. Next thing the doctor told him was that once I was ventilated, I stabilized quickly.

If God brings you to it;
He will bring you through it.

All I remember is waking up the next morning, laying flat on my back, somewhere I'd never been before, alone with something down my throat. It was by far the more fearful time of my entire life. The next thing I know there's a nurse talking to me. Obviously telling me things that wouldn't require a response since I couldn't speak. She told me I'd had a healthy baby that was doing fine. I had some complications and was currently in the ICU and the tube down my throat was breathing for me and I should try not to talk or move. Then she let my husband in. Just his smile soothed all my fears. Of course I tried talking to him {which immediately made my start gagging, cute I know}. I had to wait which seemed like forever, for the doctor to come and take my ventilation machine off. The second it was removed I was fully breathing on my own.

I was then moved to the top floor where I spent the next four days getting numerous blood transfusions, still not allowed to see my baby Charlie. Finally on the fifth day, I was allowed a visit. Very brief but so desperately needed. They wheeled in this tiny baby bed fully covered in plastic. Like she was a present that I got to open. That's what she was. Our little gift from God. I held her in my arms. There is no better feeling. Then I smelled her. That amazing baby smell that felt like it re-energized me.  A few moments later, she was wheeled away.

By the sixth day I was well enough to go home but baby Charlie hadn't yet gained the needed weight to be discharged from the NICU. We were sent home, alone. I was told to take it very easy while I recuperated yet I needed to be in the NICU every 3 hours for a feeding. After 3 days of the constant back and forth, one of our final trips home for the night, I start bleeding, profusely. Urgently rushed into the hospital and had to have an emergency hysterectomy to save my life {yet again}. The doctors were devastated they had to preform this procedure on someone so young. My husband and I didn't even a question it. We had already been blessed with two wonderful daughters and it saved my life.

After I spent another week in the hospital recovering from surgery, both Charlie and I were discharged to go home. So about three weeks after our first step in the hospital, and one incredible story to tell our grandchildren, we were home. Nothing had ever felt better.

While 
we try to teach
our children
all about life,
our children teach us
what life
 is all about.


Saturday, March 24, 2012

A Little Piece of Me... Thoughts On Motherhood



Thoughts On Motherhood


My name is Salena and I have been married to Rudy for almost 15 years.


I'm a mother of six and a grandmother of three.  I am a stay-at-home mommy to my three little girls and they keep me very busy.  I was born and raised on Oahu, Hawaii and I have lived here all my life.


I have been a mother for 27 years.  I say 27 years because I believe we are mothers before we even know our babies are growing inside us. 




I am mommy to:
Ashley (26)
Kapono (23)
Saphire (22)
Aleshanee (6)
Dakota (4)
Hayden (2)




I am grandmother to:
Makana (4)
Aaliyah (3)
Kaenen (2)





I have been a
Teenage mother
Single mother

Mother of...
2 baby angels in heaven
Every stage through adulthood
TEENAGERS with raging HORMONES!!!!!
drama queen
special needs child
movie star
bride


I am also a mother-in-law.


If I missed anything, I know my kids will read this and set me straight.  =)

You may be surprised to know, when I was a little girl, I NEVER wanted to have kids.  Shocking I know.  I am one that cannot stand pain and I knew I would never be able to go through childbirth.

When I was 15 I found out I was pregnant with my oldest daughter, Ashley.  In all the shock, fear (of my parents), and being disappointed in myself, the one thing I knew is I wanted to keep my baby.  There was not even a hint of doing anything otherwise.  I had my son, Kapono when I was 18 and then my daughter, Saphire at 19.  

Many years in between 16 to be exact
5 years of unexplained secondary infertility
Fertility procedures
Fertility drugs and injections
Surgeries

And a heart breaking missed miscarriage at 11-1/2 weeks (you can read about it more here) and all that goes along with that we were finally blessed with our daughter, Aleshanee

Then, to our total shock we were eventually blessed with our daughters, Dakota and then Hayden.


Most recently, another shock... we found out we were expecting again.  I suspected on Thanksgiving that something wasn't right.  Sure enough we found out we were pregnant again.  Unfortunately, at 9-1/2 weeks, on New Years Eve we lost our baby to another missed miscarriage (you can read about it more here).  

Looking back at it all there are some days I wonder how I got here.  When I read this back I am amazed to see how much I have changed, how much God has entrusted me with and how much I am blessed.



People ask me advice all the time and assume I know everything about parenting.  They tell me that I must be a pro at this because I have so many kids and have been a mother for so long.

Here are some things I can share with you
Each child is different
They have a mind of their own
They have different needs and sometimes it happens all at the same time
They need to experience life, good and bad
They cannot be controlled
They need your undivided attention
They need to be heard
They need to be understood
They need for you to be fair to them
They need your protection
They need to feel loved and they need you to express it with words, by physical touch, and by your actions
They need to know you are proud of them
They need your support
They need to know you believe in them


One thing I know for sure we are here for a purpose.  As parents, we want to protect our children.  Naturally we don’t want them to get hurt.  I’m learning that we are to guide them in the right direction but ultimately God is using them for a bigger purpose.  With my older kids, I tried to control their environment and protect them from everything that seemed harmful.  I mean, it seems only natural that a mother would do this.  My kids did not benefit from being protected in that way.  I didn’t step back and allow God to work in their lives in His way.  Don’t get me wrong I believe that HE prevails no matter what I do.  I do however know that I need to do things differently with my younger 3 and ultimately with all of them, including my grandchildren in the future.

I must constantly remind myself that they are here for a greater purpose.  To step back and let them find what it is they are here for.  To trust that the things they are going through, the choices and mistakes they make all lead to God molding them to where they need to be.  When I have this understanding, I am better equipped to love them, believe in them and to support them in their Journey.


xoxo, Salena


A Little Piece of Me


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Friday, March 9, 2012

{Guest Post} Casey Wiegand + Win Casey Wiegand Ad Space

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My name is Casey Wiegand, I am a freelance artist, wife and mama. 


I love painting and sharing our life through my blog...where you can expect pieces of my perspective on life, faith, kids, marriage, with touches of art, creative inspiration, projects and things I love along the way. I have two little ones with the hopes of lots more and am married to the love of my life!


Any C-section mamas out there? Any of you look at/see/ notice your scars everytime you are getting ready/ showering, etc?
Well, I do.
I love my scar. I love what it represents.
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I love that long after my children are grown, I will still have my scar from my 2 previous c-sections (and however many more). I love that it is a daily reminder to me of the 2 little lives I have to take care of & think about.
Scars represent beautiful things. They make us who we are.
What about our emotional scars? We all have them. Some run deeper than others...some change us for better and some create walls in us.
Our scars make us who we are, don't they?
When I started blogging it was because I found this quote:
"I find beauty in not only the beautiful things in life, but the bittersweet and sad as well. To me, there is something poignantly lovely about the human experience from its splendor to its grief. God created all our emotions, not just the happy ones, and for His good purposes. That's why a good cry can feel so good. And hitting our limits forces us to look outside ourselves for a Savior. It is in the plea, when we're at our end, that we can find that which is truly life-giving. Personally, my moments of deepest grief, deepest pain, have resulted in the most beautiful seasons in my heart. I've met God more intimately in those moments than in all the other pleasant ones combined. What isn't completely lovely about that?" 
Leslie.
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I was going through a hard time and something about this quote gave me hope. And peace. And then the entire blogging experience and community pulled me out. Into a better place. 
Now...just months later, here I am embracing the scars... letting my hurt make me lovely.
I realized something along the way. I am better off with my hurt. My past. Embracing all that has happened and allowing it to make me a better me :)
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Isn't she just amazing!
Which one of your lucky peeps would like to win ad space on Casey's blog for the entire month of April?

Now you can enter below to win!
**Your must be a public follower of Our Reflection via GFC to enter our giveaways.**

Mandatory:
The first THREE entries below are MANDATORY.
All 3 must be completed in order for you to win this giveaway.
After you do that, you unlock more ways to get more entries!

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Sunday, March 4, 2012

{Sponsor Spotlight} Megan from Absolute Mommy

My very first sponsor spotlight of March is with the amazingly awesome Megan from Absolute Mommy. Not only because she's my niece {which is very cool}, but because she's not phony. She's not hiding behind the walls of "who you should be" or "what you should do". She's a mom on a mission to be the best she can be! This is what she has to say about blogging:


"If blogging doesn't save me NOTHING will... I'm going to be honest about 
motherhood, parenting, and life. I'm also going to be sarcastic, sometimes funny 
and hopefully genuine. My motto is:  I wasn't built for motherhood, it built me.  
It's a work in progress! So join me on my journey of rediscovering that woman 
formerly known as Megan, who now is exclusively Mommy."
A little note from Megan:
I'm a stay at home mamma who loves blogging, pinterest, and twitter, and sometimes Facebook.  I'm co-dependent on my iPhone to a point that is almost scary.  I have two little lovely girlies I call daughters who rock my world.  And my Hubby, God Bless him loves me anyway.

I asked Megan in her entire blogging life, what are three posts she would want everyone to read. Here's her response:


Make sure you reach out to Megan and send her some love. She writes one of those "daily must read" blogs. These are the ways to connect with Megan:


Blog  |  Facebook  |  Twitter  |  Bloglovin  |  Pinterest  |  Hellocotton



Simple Crafts with Kids Bring Lifelong Memories

I love Spring. Colors become pastels, flowers begin to bloom and you can buy Cadbury Egg's! Yes, I admit it. I have a weakness for Easter candy. 

One of the things on my year's "to-do" list was to spend more one-on-one with the kids {my 14 year old hates being called a "kid" but she's still my baby}. In the past few months we've started doing weekly crafts in our house. I have to admit my 6-year old daughter is much more excited and involved but all around, it brings us closer together. We laugh together, well mostly at me, but that's ok. I'm loving every second of it.

I've put together some crafty ideas I want to do with the kids during this Spring. I know we won't be able to make all of them, but a handful will do.
The sources are all available on my Pinterest Spring Fever page here.

I encourage everyone with kids, make a craft at least once a week together. It doesn't have to be anything extravagant. The paint chip egg garland above wouldn't take long at all and cost almost nothing. Your kids just want you. These will be lifelong memories, for the both of you.


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